Jeff Rice is Spreading It Thick (and more!)

Jeff Rice has a new article up over at the CDT. The article is entitled: Spreading It Thick. Does anyone have any guesses about what this article might be about? A title for a porno with a lot of allusions to mayonnaise? No. No it isn't. Did you answer, an in depth look at the spread offense including the sets, personnel, and methods used to employ said offense? Well, it isn't really that either.

I'm afaid Jeff's first mistake was talking to Jay Paterno about the Spread HD offense and then putting in his article. Jeff also seems to put the most useless quotes possible from Jay into his article.

“Everything’s going really well,” Penn State quarterbacks coach Jay Paterno said. “The guys are picking things up pretty quickly, and it’s really a continuation of what we did in the spring, so it’s not really anything new.”

Ok. Cooooool. Everything is great. Nothing is new. Super. So far, we know nothing. Maybe that was just a tease. The real treat comes later in the article:

What exactly will the spread entail? Penn State gave little indication in April’s Blue-White game, keeping the plays and formations basic, but practices then and this summer have included a little bit of everything — option plays, three-and four-wide receiver sets, and plays where two or even three backs line up behind the quarterback.

Really?

That is really what it is? A little bit of everything? This is what the offense is going to be? Thanks for the insight, Jeff. Alright, who is going to play QB?

As of now, the playbook is the same no matter which quarterback is under center. Clark and Devlin have spent a nearly equal amount of time working with the first-team offense.

Jeff manages to be wrong about this by assuming that one player will win the "starting" job and then the other player will ride the pine. This is going to be a two QB offense the entire season. Why? Beacause neither Clark nor Devlin will have the durability of M-Rob or Tebow. Penn State is going to need both players to run the spread this season.


Now Jeff brings it home with this:

Options are exactly what the Nittany Lions hope to have this season. The more of them, the better.

Solid analysis, big guy.

What do I think the Spread HD is? It is going to be a run based offense which will utilize multiple skill players to spread the field, triple options to keep the defense guessing, and the occaisional deep routes to keep the safeties honest. Weird. I didn't even have to interview Jay to find that out.

What I really learned, however, is that Joepa finally managed to stop tape recorders dead in their tracks using only his mind.

GO STATE! SPREAD 'EM OUT!